Christian humor quotes

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I think he would prefer an honest and righteous atheist to a TV preacher whose every word is God, God, God, and whose every deed is foul, foul, foul. The price of freedom of religion, or of speech, or of the press, is that we must put up with a good deal of rubbish. The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple. And so without further ado, here they are. Then Joshua led the Hebrews in the battle of Geritol. The local paper read: Hitler had millions, Jesus had There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. When the three wise guys from the East side arrived, they found Jesus in the manager.

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  • Funny Christian Quotes LaffGaff, Home Of Laughter

  • funny and serious religion quotes

    22/03/ Explore Christian Funny Pictures's board "Christian Funny Quotes" on Pinterest. | See more ideas about Hilarious, Bible verses and Christian. Chritianpost: Quotes. I want to be so full of Jesus Christ that if a mosquito bites me it flies away singing There Is Power in the BLOOD, Christian humor. Explore Chris Wau's board "funny christian quotes " on Pinterest. | See more ideas about Hilarious, Jokes and Christian humor.
    If I were not an atheist, I would believe in a God who would choose to save people on the basis of the totality of their lives and not the pattern of their words.

    When I discovered reincarnation. Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals. Christianity is the strangest religion ever set up, for it committed a murder upon Jesus in order to redeem mankind from the sin of eating an apple. They said "Let us pray," and we dutifully shut our eyes.

    He is always convinced that it says what he means.

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    Lead me not into temptation.

    images christian humor quotes
    Christian humor quotes
    The price of freedom of religion, or of speech, or of the press, is that we must put up with a good deal of rubbish.

    When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I was an atheist, a woman in the audience stood up and said, 'Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the Protestants in whom you don't believe?

    Funny Christian Quotes LaffGaff, Home Of Laughter

    If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error. I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.

    Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day; give him a religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish.

    "Don't use words too big for the subject. Don't say 'infinitely' when you mean 'very '; otherwise you'll have no word left when you want to talk about something. Here at LaffGaff, we study humor religiously and that's how we know that you'll find these funny Christian quotes hilarious!

    Read more now. Enjoy a list of well-known funny Christian sayings. Man Rasing His Delivering you the best in inspirational articles, life stories, quotes and more. Bible Reading.
    Jesus enunciated the Golden Rule, which says to do one to others before they do one to you.

    Religion is doing what you are told, no matter what is right. True religion is real living; living with all one's soul, with all one's goodness and righteousness. The following statements about the Bible were written by children. Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason than that of blindfolded fear.

    The following week a rabbi comes in, gets a haircut, goes to pay, and the barber says, "No, Rabbi, you are a learned man, a wise man, I can't take any money from you, go in peace.

    images christian humor quotes

    The worst moment for the atheist is when he is really thankful and has nobody to thank.

    images christian humor quotes
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    Religious belief is a fine guide around which a person might organize his own life, but an awful instrument around which to organize someone else's life.

    In his fear, all attempts to shoot the bear were unsuccessful. The biblical account of Noah's Ark and the Flood is perhaps the most implausible story for fundamentalists to defend. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to the garage makes you a car. Finally, he turned and ran as fast as he could. Please give this bear some 'religion!

    Christian Humor Quotes, One Liners & Jokes, Christian Humor Blog, 7 Funny Christian Humor Jokes & Quotes.

    Welcome to the Sunday. Christian Quotes about Humorous. Part of a large selection of Christian quotes and sayings in a variety of topics by famous people, authors, theologians, pastors. “A ghostly smile flickered across his face. "If you weren't so psychotic, you'd be fun to hang around." "Funny, I feel that way about you too." He didn't say anything .
    Magically appearing on the doorstep are 12 rubies.

    I have never resisted the lord in my life, and I never will. The only reason you are not yet a saint is because you do not wholly want to be one The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because they are generally the same people.

    Video: Christian humor quotes 49 More Funny Fortnite Memes

    The next day the papers read:

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    There is a story, which is fairly well known, about when the missionaries came to Africa. He also explained, "a man doth not live by sweat alone.

    And so without further ado, here they are.

    images christian humor quotes

    What really matters is the one I choose to believe in. If it were proven that there is no God there would be no religion. I think he would prefer an honest and righteous atheist to a TV preacher whose every word is God, God, God, and whose every deed is foul, foul, foul. Woman was God's second mistake.

    4 thoughts on “Christian humor quotes

    1. The local paper read: Religious belief is a fine guide around which a person might organize his own life, but an awful instrument around which to organize someone else's life.

    2. On the other hand, the Bible contains much that is relevant today, like Noah taking 40 days to find a place to park. Matthew who was also a taximan.

    3. Man cannot make a worm, yet he will make gods by the dozen. In religion and politics people's beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second-hand, and without examination, from authorities who have not themselves examined the questions at issue but have taken them at second-hand from other non-examiners, whose opinions about them were not worth a brass farthing.